Yes, I know. I wrapped up my year early. Haven't written a damn thing since December 1st of 2oo9. You've been ignored, neglected, left in a small dark room on your own. What got to me? Was it a medically-induced coma due to the horrific effects of H1N1 flu? (No... I beat that on my own, actually, long before 12/1.) Did Homeland Security finally decide enough was enough and send out the cloaks to bring me in? No... Well, what then?
It was nothing. I got tired of swinging away on the 565-yard, par-6 hole that was 'o9 and so, like that other golfer you may have heard a lot about lately, I picked up my ball. That's what you have to do sometimes. Just pick up the ball and go on to the next hole and hope you'll have better luck there.
Besides, you know how holiday weekends are, filled with obligations and parties and shopping and shipping and writing out cards and wiping ear sweat off the screen on your cell phone. We're all bound by the same ties, at least for this certain part of the year, right? Hell, without you readers, I even made time to go see a movie at the theater, which is a rare treat for me.
We went and saw Avatar. Nobody hasn't heard of Avatar, the super-digital 3D smash hit by James Cameron, which is still selling out IMAX screens weeks after its release. It was every millimeter as stunning as you've heard it was. So amazing are the special effects that the fairly pedestrian plot and the three hours in a theater seat are so easily forgiven as to go unnoticed.
On the way home, though, Avatar begin to strike me as something different. The themes contained in the movie were, well, pretty liberal. Extremely, in fact, liberal. I'm not one of these sadists who wants to ruin the movie for everyone, so I'll generalize as much as possible in my agenda-checklist:
- The first line of narrative dialogue disparages the Veterans Administration and its care of wounded soldiers. Hello, Walter Reed.
- The human militia that protects the corporate interests on Planet Pandora are made up of former troops just looking to make a buck. Goodbye, Blackwater.
- Corporate greed causes a shocking disregard for anything that might be remotely considered sacred in pursuit of profits driven by untapped planetary resources. There are too many Earthly comparisons, but oil may suffice as the most obvious.
- Fear of other races versus acceptance of other races.
- Destruction of the environment as opposed to preservation of the environment.
- The notion that people with disabilities can (and should) still contribute to causes greater than themselves.
- The belief in Earth (well, Pandora) as God and God as Earth (or Pandora).
Cameron did everything but advocate for an Avatar abortion. That's probably because he was unable to have an affair with any of the actual Avatar actresses (see Titanic). These are the least of things which have already offended conservative bloggers, although the mainstream media has clearly turned the other cheek and acted as if they had seen nothing at all.
For the distinct minority's part, their mechanized responses have been joyous to read. I haven't even mentioned the parts about socialized medicine, populist unity or conservative rejection of the scientific method. But it's all in there, trust me. And it's all aimed at - you guessed it - the children.
Is Avatar indeed a progressive splinter that will cause the minds of young people to ooze out the liberal agenda for as long as they live? Is it subliminal indoctrination to the extreme? Yes, it is, and that leaves me just one more thing to say about it.
Good!
pH 1.o5.1o
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